The Great Needle Reprieve of 2009

Just as Courage the Turkey has been offered pardon by President Obama, so I have been offered reprieve from the terrible progesterone-in-oil shot.

Ever since my first progesterone shot, I have developed a fever of between 101 and 102 every day from 5 pm to 11:30. The kind of fever that makes me want to layer on four sweaters, fleece pants, a coat, gloves and a hat. I alerted my medical professionals to this on day one, and they responded that the fever had nothing to do with anything they were doing. This went on and on for four days, and then Tuesday, my husband came home and found me under the traditional pile of outwear and blankets and declared that this was not normal and that possibly I had the swine flu. He called the doctor and persuaded him to "have me evaluated the next day."

The next day, I went in, and the nurse evaluated me, came to the conclusion that I did not have the swine flu, and said that she had never seen anyone have a fevers like this in reaction to progesterone-in-oil injections. But they agreed to let me switch to a different form of progesterone supplementation after just one more shot. To stop my constant complaining, I suppose. So now, even though I had that last shot yesterday, and spent my evening shivering on the couch, a delight to all in the family, and even though I still have welts on each of my butt cheeks, I am free of needles for the time being. Hooray!! I am also apparently free of fevers, as it is now 6:17, and I am tired and nauseated, but not shivering.

I am thankful for alternatives to progesterone-in-oil shot.

Happy Thanksgiving!

A Pain in my Ass and Other Obsecenities

I went to my doctor's office today to have my first progesterone shot. Most IVF women have their partners administer this intramuscular shot, but I chose to leave my loved ones out of it, largely because the instruction to insert the rather thick needle in the muscle of my upper outer buttock with a sharp, dart-like motion made me nervous. I didn't want to be anyone's guinea pig for this kind of stabbing.

The nurse had me lie down on my side, drew up the progesterone and did use the previously mentioned sharp-dart-like motion into my left "hip." (Hip is the euphemism of choice for upper outer buttock.)(If you are really interested, you can see the actual injection process by clicking on the Intramuscular Injection Lessons video at Village Fertility Pharmacy.) It felt like what I imagine a wasp sting might feel like. The pain dissipated after a moment, and I thought that was going to be it. I made plans with my husband and mother to go out to dinner after one last pre-transfer trip to the gym.

I went home and didn't think about it for a while. My mother was also feeling the stir-craziness I mentioned earlier today so she suggested we go to the local mall. It was three o'clock, and already getting dark. It was raining. None of these things were helping with my mood.
But for whatever reason, at 3 o'clock, roughly 5 hours after the shot, my left hip began to hurt. It started as an ache, as though I had done too many lunges, but by the time we go to the mall, it felt like someone had punched me. I could barely walk. I sat at a coffeeshop, drinking decaf for two hours, while my mother enjoyed some well-deserved time away from the house.
On the way home, my hip was throbbing. The GPS suggested, politely, that I take the highway instead of a regular road, and I screamed FUCK FUCK FUCK while laughing and crying simultaneously.

My mother was unusually quiet.

We pulled into the driveway at the same time as my husband, so I let him carry everything inside. Then I took off my raincoat, went into our room, and changed into the following outfit:

1. brown fleece pants
2. pink Ugg boots
3. red wool sweater
4. aqua cashmere robe
5. sheepskin-lined gloves

I was still cold. This may be a symptom of living in Oregon, and not a symptom of progesterone-in-oil.

Then I took two extra strength tylenol while my loved ones discussed the better method for supplying a heating pad.

My husband reminded me that I acted with the same level of crazy last time I went on progesterone. I have only the vaguest memory of this. Perhaps someone was slipping me some Versed.