Nayla, by way of introduction

Nayla is a rare sort of person, clever and beautiful and uber articulate. I remember reading her fiction writing (even when my head was full of Clomid, a feeling not dissimilar from the one you get after eating confectioner’s sugar straight from the box) and being enthralled by it. These were during the days when a single digit countdown to atomic war could have put me to sleep.

Still, Nayla and I should probably not be friends. For the past two years, we have shared the same misfortune, one after the other, from fertility treatments to fathers with similar cancers. We've even had the same weird and complicated miscarriage. I mean, honestly. If I happen to get a rash on my face, or she hits a deer with her car, under no circumstances should either one of us share that information with the other, because the next week we are likely to find ourselves exchanging auto repair resources or the best type of antihistamine. It’s true that she’s lovely and charming and one of the most intelligent people you’ll probably ever meet, one of those people so clever and beautiful that you really don’t expect for them to be a nice person, in addition to everything else, but for the past two years, eerily similar crummy luck and statistically improbable travails have followed us. For that reason, and because she’s a more proactive person and certainly a stronger person, and going through active treatment right now, I expect her to change our luck substantially. No pressure, Nayla.

I’ve never met either one of Nayla’s parents, but she has a sort of generosity about her that you either have or you do not. My husband, who is French, translates that attribute “to be educated correctly,” and what he means by this is to be educated about the general way to go through life, how to look at people with kindness, and to remain gentle in the face of obstacles. I bet Nayla would tell you where she gets that from, and I’d agree with her, which I suppose touches on what we are trying to get at in these entries.

So while we’ve shared some past experiences I believe we both could have lived without, I’m grateful to be going through this particular one with her.